why are emotes so hard


fighting for my life trying to get this damn emote plugin to work and it doesn’t do anything ughhh. i guess i can just manually enter the code every time i want to use an emote. BUT I WON’T LIKE IT at least the textile language makes it a lot quicker to do so.

i’m sure there has to be a way to get it working but i’m too sleepy to fuck with it anymore today….i ate 2 ham sandwiches and i’m teetering on the edge of a food coma. ever since i started lamotrigine i’ve been dealing with a drastically lowered appetite, and i have to sort of gently force myself to put food in my stomach after i wake up. i say “gently” because it’s not like food is repulsive to me now, it’s just that i’m not motivated to eat? so i’ll have a meal after i wake up and then won’t feel like i need to eat again for the rest of the day. i still do need to eat, obviously, but i feel like i don’t need to. i usually love food because i am A Fat so this is all very new and strange to me, lol.

i’m also dealing with some new memory loss/confusion issues since i went up to 100mg. which is a little concerning because i already have a terrible memory lol. idk if it’s memory loss, actually— it’s mostly that i’m having some trouble speaking, like, my tongue gets tied and i forget words a lot. i’ll be speaking to someone about an object that is in the room with us and i can’t remember what it’s called; for example, i’ll be trying to say “put that bag down on the table” and it comes out like “put that bag down on the…uhhhhh…..” and the other person just has to assume what i’m talking about. the tongue twisting annoys me much more than the word loss thing though. nothing is more annoying and embarrassing than getting stuck in a loop of trying to say a word and just babbling syllables like donnie from the wild thornberries. like i’m having a stroke call the bondulance